Tuesday, August 24, 2010

This MUST be a Joke

I went to see a doctor today because I have had stomach and digestive issues for as long as I can remember. Five years ago, I correlated it with lactose intolerance. Cutting out dairy was a big help, but it didn't fix everything.

After waiting one hour to see the doctor for five minutes, she told me that increasing my fluid and fiber intake would be a great benefit. BUT if that doesn't work, then I may be having an adverse reaction to gluten.

ARE YOU FREAKIN' KIDDING ME? I already gave up so much. Do you know how many different foods have gluten? I didn't either until I Googled it. (source: Food Allergy Gourmet)

The following pre-made foods contain gluten, unless they are marked "Gluten-Free" on the label.

  • Foods
  • Bagels
  • Beer
  • Biscuits
  • Blue cheese (made with bread)
  • Bread
  • Broth (pre-made, cubes, powder)
  • Cake
  • Cheese (pre-shredded)
  • Cookies
  • Corn Dogs
  • Corn Bread
  • Couscous
  • Crackers
  • Croutons
  • Cupcakes
  • Deli Cut or Cold Cut Meats (unless sliced on a dedicated gluten-free meat slicer)
  • Doughnuts
  • French Toast
  • French Fries (if frozen or coated)
  • Funnel Cake
  • Graham Crackers
  • Gravy
  • Hushpuppies
  • Macaroni
  • Malted milk (malt is made from barley)
  • Matzo
  • Muesli
  • Muffins
  • Noodles
  • Oatmeal
  • Pancakes
  • Pasta
  • Pastry
  • Pie
  • Pita or Pocket Bread
  • Pretzel
  • Salad Dressing
  • Semolina
  • Soup
  • Sour Cream
  • Soy Sauce, Shoyu
  • Spaghetti
  • Stock (pre-made, cubes, powder)
  • Stuffing
  • Toast
  • Tabbouleh
  • Teriyaki sauce
  • Waffles
  • Yogurt

These Ingredients Contain Gluten

These ingredients contain gluten, unless marked "Gluten-Free" on the label. Always read the ingredients on the label and check with the manufacturer to determine whether or not they are safe.

  • Alcoholic spirits (Specific Spirits)
  • Amp-isostearoyl hydrolyzed wheat protein
  • Barley, Barley grass (may contain seeds)
  • Barley hordeum vulgare
  • Barley malt
  • Beer (except gluten-free beer)
  • Bleached flour
  • Bran
  • Bread flour
  • Brewer's yeast
  • Brown flour
  • Bulgur
  • Cake flour (meal)
  • Cereal
  • Binding
  • Couscous
  • Dextrimaltose
  • Disodium wheatgermamido peg-2 sulfosuccinate
  • Durum flour
  • Edible starch
  • Einkorn
  • Emmer
  • Farina
  • Filler
  • Flour (usually means wheat flour)
  • Fu (dried wheat gluten)
  • Gliadin
  • Gluten
  • Graham flour
  • Granary flour
  • Groats (barley, wheat, oat)
  • Hard wheat
  • Hydrolyzed wheat gluten
  • Hydrolyzed wheat protein
  • Hydrolyzed wheat protein pg-propyl silanetriol
  • Hydrolyzed wheat starch
  • Hydroxypropyltrimonium hydrolyzed wheat protein
  • Kamut
  • Macha wheat
  • Malt (made from barley)
  • Malt (extract, flavoring, syrup, vinegar
  • Malted milk
  • Matzo meal, semolina
  • Mir
  • Oat bran, oatmeal, oats, rolled oats, groats, flour
  • Oriental wheat
  • Pasta (excepts gluten-free)
  • Pearl barley
  • Persian wheat
  • Polish wheat
  • Poulard wheat
  • Rice Malt (if barley or Koji are used)
  • Rye
  • Seitan
  • Semolina Spelt, small
  • Sprouted wheat or barley
  • Stearyldimoniumhydroxypropyl hydrolyzed wheat protein
  • Strong flour
  • Suet (in packets)
  • Textured Vegetable Protein - TVP
  • Triticale (a wheat-rye blend)
  • Triticale X triticosecale
  • Triticum vulgare flour lipids, germ extract, germ oil
  • Udon (wheat noodles)
  • Unbleached flour
  • Vavilovi wheat
  • Vegetable starch
  • Wheat (Abyssinian hard, club, common, durum, timopheevi, bulgur, Shot)
  • Wheat bran extract, amino acids
  • Wheat berries
  • Wheat durum triticum
  • Wheat germ, germ extract, germ oil, or lipids
  • Wheat grass (may contain seeds)
  • Wheat nuts, protein or starch
  • Whole wheat, flour
  • Wild einkorn, emmer

These Ingredients and Foods May Contain Gluten

These ingredients may or may not contain gluten. Always read the ingredients on the label and check with the manufacturer to determine whether or not they are safe.

  • Anti-Caking Ingredients
  • Artificial Color
  • Artificial Flavoring
  • Binders
  • Bouillon, cubes or powder
  • Broth
  • Caramel
  • Color, coloring
  • Catsup
  • Cereal
  • Cheese (starting molds may be introduced on bread crumbs)
  • Curry powder (spices sometimes contain undisclosed flour to improve flow)
  • Demiglace
  • Dextrins
  • Emulsifiers
  • Excipients
  • Farina
  • Fillers
  • Flavor, Flavoring
  • Food Starch
  • Glucose Syrup
  • Gluten
  • Gum Hydrolyzed plant protein (HPP)
  • Hydrolyzed vegetable protein (HVP)
  • Ketchup
  • Leavening Maltodextrin
  • Maltose
  • Miso
  • Modified Food Starch
  • Mono and Diglycerides
  • Monosodium Glutimate (MSG) (imported MSG may contain wheat)
  • Mustard (wheat flour may be a hidden ingredient)
  • Mustard Powder
  • Natural Flavor, Natural Flavoring
  • Rice Syrup (may use barley enzymes)
  • Seasoning
  • Shortening (possible added vitamin E from wheat germ)
  • Shoyu (soy sauce)
  • Smoke Flavoring
  • Soba Noodles
  • Sour cream
  • Soy Sauce
  • Spices (may contain flour to improve flow)
  • Stabilizers
  • Starch
  • Stock, pre-made Stock cubes or powder
  • Textured vegetable protein (TVP, same as HVP)
  • Tomato paste (hidden ingredients may include HVP)
  • Vanilla or other flavored extracts
  • Vegetable gum
  • Vegetable shortening (possible added vitamin E from wheat germ)
  • Vitamins
  • Wheat Starch
  • White pepper (may contain flour to improve flow)
  • Yeast or yeast extract (may be grown or dried on wheat flour)
The list pretty much includes everything I eat. I WOULD RATHER HAVE DIARRHEA.


Spencer said...

so....what are you gonna eat now?

Alvin said...

One of my friends can't eat gluten. Granted, he could potentially die on top of diarrhea. Pretty much anything with wheat or flower uses gluten.

BUT you can still live. There are a lot of gluten-free products out there and a lot of recipes you could try out, and you'll pretty much be as healthy as/healthier than the average vegetarian.

So it's not as bad as you think, sis. ;)

Alvin said...



Tiffany said...

Gluten-free crackers are light and delicious! My landlady is on a "no gluten" diet and it just means she eats more fruits and veggies! So Alvin's comment is very true :)